"Sex is a normal behavior," Gael protested a little half-heartedly. He wanted to say he was fine, but he didn't know. There was a certain fatality to it, he thought. His father, Leon, had been plagued with depression most of his life. And Gael wasn't blind to the demons that chased his father- hell, he was named for one. Being the namesake to a dead uncle, dead twin uncle at that, had had a strange affect on things growing up. There had been more than once Leon had said, or muttered rather, how much like 'him' he was.
Still, he took a ragged breath as he leaned back. He wasn't sure he believed himself when he said 'it won't happen again', but he'd certain be more careful about it. And hell, he liked having sex with people like Seth. It made him feel alive, it thrilled him to be the center of someone's attention in a why he couldn't be at home. Because as much as Gael needed his father to wrap his arms around him and tell him he was loved...
Daniel had needed Gael to be strong. Both of Daniel's children had seen just how hard everything had been on their father, and while Noelle hadn't been able to cope with it entirely...Gael had sort of taken it on. He cooked, stopped speaking French around the house, cleaned, took care of the house. Took care of Leon's cat until the poor thing seemed to die of heart break. It had sat on Leon's desk and chair and yowled for months after. And maybe Daniel hadn't thought his children saw it, his own pain. Maybe he thought he'd hidden the heartache in his eyes, because he certainly hid the tears...But Gael saw it.
And Gael thought it had been the last time he'd cried, himself. He'd sworn to himself he'd never cry, that he'd never lose someone else he cared for like that again.
And maybe that was why he didn't want to fall for Carlos Sanchez, really. Because losing someone was only something he thought he could deal with once. And Claire had drilled that home clearly, when she'd broken him a little more. Not, he supposed, that he'd been overly faithful in that relationship himself.
"Papa," he said, picking at his jeans on his raised knee. But he fell silent, not knowing what he even wanted to say. And for the first time in a long time, he felt his chest constrict as a warm tear hit is cheek. His breath was ragged as he ducked his head down into his arms, hugging his leg closer.
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Still, he took a ragged breath as he leaned back. He wasn't sure he believed himself when he said 'it won't happen again', but he'd certain be more careful about it. And hell, he liked having sex with people like Seth. It made him feel alive, it thrilled him to be the center of someone's attention in a why he couldn't be at home. Because as much as Gael needed his father to wrap his arms around him and tell him he was loved...
Daniel had needed Gael to be strong. Both of Daniel's children had seen just how hard everything had been on their father, and while Noelle hadn't been able to cope with it entirely...Gael had sort of taken it on. He cooked, stopped speaking French around the house, cleaned, took care of the house. Took care of Leon's cat until the poor thing seemed to die of heart break. It had sat on Leon's desk and chair and yowled for months after. And maybe Daniel hadn't thought his children saw it, his own pain. Maybe he thought he'd hidden the heartache in his eyes, because he certainly hid the tears...But Gael saw it.
And Gael thought it had been the last time he'd cried, himself. He'd sworn to himself he'd never cry, that he'd never lose someone else he cared for like that again.
And maybe that was why he didn't want to fall for Carlos Sanchez, really. Because losing someone was only something he thought he could deal with once. And Claire had drilled that home clearly, when she'd broken him a little more. Not, he supposed, that he'd been overly faithful in that relationship himself.
"Papa," he said, picking at his jeans on his raised knee. But he fell silent, not knowing what he even wanted to say. And for the first time in a long time, he felt his chest constrict as a warm tear hit is cheek. His breath was ragged as he ducked his head down into his arms, hugging his leg closer.