"I'm scared, Elisha." Hadyn said softly, even though he knew it was rational to feel that way. He knew the science, the medically sound thought and the outcomes. He knew that life would change and that they would change. Now every second was going to be precious because...it could be the last. "I haven't been...scared like this in so...long." He felt his body shaking from it, the emotion of it. And for all his knowing, for all his understanding that grief and fear was normal... he didn't know if he could face it.

Turning, he leaned into Elisha and wrapped his arms around his husband. He needed Elisha in a way, he realised, he hadn't needed him in a long time. He needed him to not let him give up, and he felt guilty for that. For putting that burden on the man he loved.

After a while, he stepped back, and let Elisha help him to the bed again. He felt helpless and weak, but like much of his day- he rationally understood why. It didn't mean he liked it. But he slept after a while, one hand clinging to Elisha as if he needed that security in order to allow himself to rest.