Are You, Are You Coming To The Tree [Carlos &Ty]

[missinglinks]

Sarah had called him. Told him. The conversation had been painfully short, though. She sounded worried, but Ty never said more than 'thanks' and 'I've got to go'. He cancelled his appointment the next morning, opting to go up to the house and attempting to do something. Mostly he just stayed clear of Poncho and the rest of the crew as they wired the house.

By the end of first day, nothing felt as if it had changed. He felt calm, but perhaps that was just a mask he wore. When Ollie tried to call him on Skype that night, in those rare moments that the ship was close enough to not rely on satellite exclusively, Ty didn't answer. He just let it ring before he pulled on a hoodie and took off to run the beach in the pitch black of night.

Except all that did was bring back memories he didn't want to deal with right then.

For the next week he kept dodging everyone. Sarah, his Dads, his therapist, group meetings,....Ollie. Especially Ollie. It was easier to sit on the balacony of their rental with a case of beer and cigarettes. Everyone else would just ask the predictable- 'are you okay', 'how are things', and his favorite 'do you need help?'.

Maybe if he had asked for it, though, he wouldn't have written that letter to Ollie. He wouldn't had cleaned the house with an insane determination for the last three days. He would have slept. He wouldn't have been focused on the mechanics of how to best just....let it all end.

Comments

[missinglinks]

"Not true. I love sunshine. I hate sand. I could do with a lot less sand in my life." It wasn't even the damn ocean that bothered him, either. Iran, he figured, had ruined his chances in loving a beach. But Ollie, honestly, couldn't have been happier. Ty figured it wasn't the worst thing to sacrifice.

"Yeah," he said nodding. "I can see it. Goddamned motors for me." He heard them in his sleep, with the rattling of bullets that rained down. It wasn't always that one day, every day in Iran seemed to blur into one in his dreams. "They have these group meetings at the VA, group therapy. They discharged me, but practically ordered me to attend them." He smiled a little at that. His commanding officers had tried hard to keep Ty from falling into the deep end.

Not to mention it was never a good idea to let a former SEAL go it alone. A hard less learned from the past.

[fistandbone]

"Who couldn't?" Carlos muttered. He wasn't much for beaches right now. But then, neither was Gael, so maybe he'd be over it by the time his boyfriend was walking again.

He preferred thinking in terms of when instead of if. He'd tried thinking that way in Iran too, but success had been limited.

"Yeah, I know all about those. The COs can't get out of the habit of issuing orders, even when they're booting you out." It wasn't even that Carlos had planned to spend his life in the Navy - he'd been thinking law enforcement or intelligence, in a vague sort of way. "How much do you hate them?"

[missinglinks]

"To be fair, that is what we're trained to do." Ty said with a rye smile as he lifted his fresh beer to his lips.

It took him a moment to really think about his answer to Carlos' question. He pulled out his pack of cigarettes and looked at it carefully before smirking a little and shaking his head. "Not the worst thing, really. I hate pyschologist, but...don't know. The group is okay."

[fistandbone]

"You've always hated psychologists," Carlos said. "Nothing real new there." He had a hard time believing that Ty really wanted to talk about it, though, with other people. Even if they were people who got it, mostly. Carlos didn't really want to, though he would go through the motions, just like any other crap mission he'd ever been on.

He shrugged. "Guess I'll see what mine's like," he said. "Not much else to do, really."

[missinglinks]

No one wanted to talk about it. Carlos would figure that out soon enough. Everyone worried the about the same sort of things, and no one wanted to admit it and then eventually....one by one people talked. And gradually things got better.

For some of them.

Ty glanced back at the gun on the table, and bit his lip his for a moment.

"Won't be as bad as you think." He promised, before shrugging. "Or so they say."

[fistandbone]

Weird for Ty to be the one pointing that out, Carlos thought, but he shrugged and straightened up a little, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "I should probably get going," he said. "It's a long drive this time of night."

[missinglinks]

"Shorter than this time in the day." Ty promised, but nodded as he stood and walked Carlos out of the apartment.

"Uh...if you want, you can come by. Whenever. Just...I think I'm going to head home for a while. See the family."

[fistandbone]

"Probably a good idea. Keeps the impromptu visits out here to a minimum." Though Carlos imagined that it was probably going to be years before Bethany and Felipe stopped the impromptu visits to him. He didn't mind so much.

"I'm gonna take some time to settle in," he said though."It should be a couple weeks at least before Gael gets sick of me hanging around the hospital all the time."